Lemme just drop this.
*closes eyes and takes a deep breath*
My blog has been inactive for 2 months now. I had to take an exam this past month and I feel that’s excuse enough for being offline.
But in all honesty I’ve been running. I’ve been playing Jonah with my writing. I was having a conversation with someone early this year and we got to my writing and the person told me something along the lines of ‘what is the point of writing if you’re not writing for God?’ After May, I felt the urge to make my blog a Christian blog and I started running. Writing became a huge challenge because it meant I won’t just close my eyes and whip something up from the depths of my imagination whenever I wanted to post; it meant I’d have to ask the Holy Spirit for help and wait for him to answer and give me the go-ahead. And sometimes it feels like I can do without God (I can’t BTW) Like why do I need his help when it comes to writing? This is like my thing; why should I ask for help? Why do I need monitoring? Why do I need to ask permission? And so on and so forth.
So it began. I started playing Jonah sometime in July, posting sporadically. A friend of mine told me that my posts were losing their buzz, what was happening to me? I was thoroughly discouraged and I kept on playing Jonah. I explained the whole situation to another friend and he told me ‘Best to write by the leading of the Spirit and touch one person’s life than for everyone to praise my posts and there’s no difference.’ His words were such an encouragement but I still kept playing Jonah.
I didn’t want to share my struggles on my blog and it’s like God wanted me to do the very thing I didn’t want to do. So as usual, when my will clashes with his, nothing works out till his will is done.
So here I am back from my hiatus (I love that word). I’m done playing Jonah. It’s time to let go. Jesus take the wheel, Im’ma be in the back seat from now on. Writing this, the heavy burden that has been on my chest–which prevented me from doing what I love for over 2 months– has been lifted.
Piece of advice: Don’t resist the will of God, it’s futile (I learnt from experience)
So… I’m back!!!
Who missed me?
👑 Àyànfé Oba (the King’s Beloved)
Happy New Month.
Happy Independence Day to all Nigerians.
God bless Nigeria.